Friday, June 7, 2019

"You should write a book!"

"You should write a book!"

I have heard that more times than I could possibly count.

I sit here at my coffee house with Pumpkin right next to me.

This after spending last evening at The Urgent Care.
My blood pressure and pain was absolutely out of control.
Praise God I have SO many loving and caring people there that know our story and have such compassion for me anytime i am there.

The conclusion the Dr came up with (after blood work, and tons of other tests) was "Even if you feel like you are doing well and aren't paying attention to dates and occurrences, your heart and head still know! Grief, Depression and Anxiety can manifest in SO many symptoms!"

Yes, Easter is coming up. So, that means so is the loss of my Precious Granddaughter 2014 and my Precious Son 2015, Two lives that touched my heart in SO many ways.

I Thank God every second of every day for the blessings they brought and continue to bring into my life.

Thursday, April 4, 2019



Since i held your precious hand
Since i looked into your beautiful eyes
Since i felt your awesome hug
Since i heard your wonderful voice
Since i heard your heartbeat

Since my hand didn't long to hold yours
Since my eyes could see without tears
Since my hugs could be without thinking of you
Since my ears could hear without wishing it was you
Since my every heartbeat didn't feel like my last

I will Love and Miss you with every single breath
Until my very last, mommama

Tuesday, March 12, 2019

Beauty for Ashes

Beauty for Ashes

To console those who mourn in Zion, 
To give them beauty for ashes, The oil of joy for mourning, The garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; That they may be called trees of righteousness, The planting of the Lord , that He may be glorified.”
Isaiah 61:3 NKJV

My life has been filled with such heartache and pain.
Some as a result of my own choices and some that others have made.
I Praise God for carrying me through what i can only say at times has been so physically and emotionally unbearable.
In between all that He has given me such precious Joy.
Right when i said "Lord i am just so worn" He has given me something to put a smile on my heart that made it my circumstances bearable.
I know we will all get our crowns in heaven, but, I am Thankful He gives us some while we are here on earth as well.
Thank You Lord for giving me "Beauty for Ashes"