Move On

Time may force me to "Push Forward", but, my heart won't let me "Move On"! RCB
I am doing good, I just want people to get the fact that you don't "Move On " from the child you lose. They are with you every second of the rest of your life. Sometimes in the back of your mind instead of the forefront, but still with you!

Memorial Garden

For those that have been wondering about the "Memorial Garden" Palo Alto Medical Foundation was supposedly going to do to remember the tragic events that led to his death at The Urgent Care, Please be with me in prayer that the events of that day would be acknowledged and help to lessen the heartbreak of this entire tragedy. The meetings and events that happened after that day have not led to what was told to me and several others involved in Bud's life and care. I was told in meetings that there were "Changes in procedures" and "more training had been done due to the events of that day" and that "something would be being done in Bud's Memory". The sooner something is done, the sooner all the people that were and are being touched by his life can have a little peace amidst the tragedy of that day. https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10201462718846861&id=1742362609

Thriving After Loss

I have been through every emotion feeling stress or trauma all of caring for a Specially-Abled Loved One. I've tried counseling. I've tried all the medications they wanted me to do. I have tried positive thinking, I've left it to The Lord to help me to get through it and He did. He got me through. With His help I survived every single bit of it. I survived the different side effects of everything that was or wasn't done. I've survived all the side effects of the medications the Doctors have put me on and switched over and over with little or no improvement at all. I have been told there is “No Magic Pill”! Every single person is different. I know for the longest time I did not do any medication or anything due to not wanting them to have any effect on my caring for Bud. Then I finally gave into doing medications when I felt I wasn’t giving him the best of me {Even though deep down I knew I was doing all I could}!! I went through several different changes in medications, again with little to NO positive changes. Also having to take additional medications due to side effects of medications. I have finally reached a point where I am finally feeling like I want to survive, I want to live and share my story. I've never felt that I had a life also and that I needed to share my life as well with people. I have now for the last Almost 3 weeks been doing something called the Thrive Experience and I have got to tell you that I feel like I am finally thriving in life even with and since the loss of the one of my living children, the things I truly feel God gave me to get me through life, and to experience God’s love for me on earth. Caring for Bud, the joys, the tragedies, the traumas and everything that we have to go through in being a parent of a Specially-Abled child or loved one. I so want to continue sharing and I pray that I can help everybody out there to Thrive through everything that we have to deal with in life. I know God gave me so much joy in Bud and everything that we did and kept me going through it and then once I lost him I had to find something else to do. My two other living children are grown adults but i still want them to see a happier and healthier me. Please please please let me know if anybody would like to talk to me at all. I am here for any prayers, questions and concerns. Any help, even just talking to as a friend through what you're going through. Considering I've been there I would love to be able to do all I can. All my love and I know Bud’s is here with me too. Thank you for reading. May God bless and keep us all safe and healthy as we follow His path. Thriving After Loss https://www.facebook.com/ThrivingAfterLoss/

Don't Just Survive, Thrive

I have been through every emotion feeling stress or trauma all of caring for a Specially-Abled Loved One. I've tried counseling. I've tried all the medications they wanted me to do. I have tried positive thinking, I've left it to The Lord to help me to get through it and He did. He got me through. With His help I survived every single bit of it. I survived the different side effects of everything that was or wasn't done. I've survived all the side effects of the medications the Doctors have put me on and switched over and over with little or no improvement at all. I have been told there is “No Magic Pill”! Every single person is different. I know for the longest time I did not do any medication or anything due to not wanting them to have any effect on my caring for Bud. Then I finally gave into doing medications when I felt I wasn’t giving him the best of me {Even though deep down I knew I was doing all I could}!! I went through several different changes in medications, again with little to NO positive changes. Also having to take additional medications due to side effects of medications. I have finally reached a point where I am finally feeling like I want to survive, I want to live and share my story. I've never felt that I had a life also and that I needed to share my life as well with people. I have now for the last Almost 3 weeks been doing something called the Thrive Experience and I have got to tell you that I feel like I am finally thriving in life even with and since the loss of the one of my living children, the things I truly feel God gave me to get me through life, and to experience God’s love for me on earth. Caring for Bud, the joys, the tragedies, the traumas and everything that we have to go through in being a parent of a Specially-Abled child or loved one. I so want to continue sharing and I pray that I can help everybody out there to Thrive through everything that we have to deal with in life. I know God gave me so much joy in Bud and everything that we did and kept me going through it and then once I lost him I had to find something else to do. My two other living children are grown adults but i still want them to see a happier and healthier me. Please please please let me know if anybody would like to talk to me at all. I am here for any prayers, questions and concerns. Any help, even just talking to as a friend through what you're going through. Considering I've been there I would love to be able to do all I can. All my love and I know Bud’s is here with me too. Thank you for reading. May God bless and keep us all safe and healthy as we follow His path.

https://facebook.com/ThrivingAfterLoss/

Sooooo much change

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10201267211319295&id=1742362609

Beautiful Love

I can honestly tell you from my heart, Forever would not have been long enough. Our SALO'S (Specially-Abled Loved Ones) are such an absolutely precious Miracle from God that no amount of time could ever be enough! Although I had my precious baby boy - 22 years 2 months and 15 days when he was taken from me so suddenly my heart was crushed. He was my world day and night for all those years. Praise God we know how valuable they are and treasure every second. As a mother for a short time or for a long time, whether we held them in our arms or only in our heart, we are sooooo blessed and sooooo thankful for every second we know that beautiful love.

Which One

WHICH ONE

Let me start off by saying I love all three of my children I gave birth to and I am so blessed and thankful to be their mother.
I am also mother to three angels I lost to miscarriages.
Now my youngest son who was Specially-Abled is also an angel.
I know things are usually done with good intentions.
I have been told "Well at least you have other children"!
I  have also been told "Well, you got longer than the doctors expected with your son"!
I am very grateful to The Lord for blessing me with all my children Born and Unborn.
But please think of this before you say anything like that to anyone else!
Which one of your children would you be willing to live without?

PTSD AND ME

PTSD AND ME

For those of us with PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder), 

It is not about what might happen, 

It's about what DID happen!

Telling a Person to "Just let it go" 

or "You need to move on" 

or 'Most 

of the things you worry about won't happen" 

or "Are not happening" 

Can not only be confusing, but, 

It can also be damaging.

The things that cause anxiety or depression have already happened! 

It's not so much about worrying - It's about remembering!!

Love hugs and prayers for all those suffering with PTSD, no matter what the 

Trauma was and Is!!!!